The other day I had the joy of placing an ad on Craigslist:

Lost Sun Hat: Last Sunday I went through a pothole on Sherbourne going north towards The Esplanade on my bike, and didn’t notice my hat fall out of my rear basket. You were driving behind me and you honked at me. I get honked at all the time in construction zones, because I often take up the whole lane. I turned around to communicate patience please.

When I got home I realized my mistake. I went back to see if my hat was around. It wasn’t. Did you pick it up?

Good hats are hard to find. And I feel like an asshole. Thank you for honking! Ugh.

(the hat looks almost exactly like this one I found on the internet)

Here is its fictional counterpart. I seriously looked for it the first couple of days:

Sun Hat Found: Dear cyclist. You dropped your hat off the back of your bike. I was driving behind you. You were taking up the whole lane. When you hit that pothole your hat flew out. I tried to tell you and I honked, but you turned around and waved your arm as if to say, cool your car-centric jets!

Now I have your hat!  It’s a nice one.